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Interpersonal Skill Building -- Yank The
Suckers & Weeds
By Althea DeBrule
According to the National Gardening Association, suckers are rapidly growing
shoots rising from an underground root or stem, often to the detriment of
the tree. They can be very irritating and annoying for they bear no flowers
or fruit. Rather than cut them off, one way to get rid of them is to roughly
yank the suckers off to remove the cells and tissues that cause re-growth.
Even if you are not a gardener, you know a lot about weeds. They are
everywhere and tend to take over, crowd a plant’s root system, and provide a
chaotic and unsightly mess. While there are many kinds of weed-killer sprays
on the market, orchard growers hesitate to use them for fear of damaging the
trees.
Unfortunately, businesses have suckers and weeds too. These unattractive
thieves rob the organization blind by ruining its competitive advantage, and
choking and stifling its people. To avoid these outcomes, try applying a
heavy layer of protective interpersonal mulch to effectively stop all but
the most persistent of suckers and weeds.
Here are four suckers and weeds that are typically found in the business
garden, along with ways to yank them out before they root too deeply:
Office Politics
Far too many workers put their faith in office politics and believe their
careers will either soar or plunge as a result of them. Office politics are
a fundamental part of the daily grind. Sometimes people who cannot succeed
on their own merit play them, and oftentimes, workers who pursue personal
hidden agendas at the expense of others practice them. How do you keep this
damaging sucker from taking root?
Learn and understand how the office political game is played. You cannot
afford to ignore office politics; whether you choose to play the political
game or abstain is up to you.
Use ethical influence to impact others without being sucked into the game.
Strengthen professional relationships with others in your company and
industry.
Increase your awareness of how the company works—who has informal power and
clout, and the unwritten as well as written rules of engagement.
Jumping to Conclusions
We often criticize others for jumping to conclusions or assuming the worst
about a situation that may be erroneous or is not justified by the facts.
When we jump to conclusions, we tend to label others based on prejudice or
stereotype, interpret their behavior as a result of assumptions, and narrow
our objectivity by becoming overly critical or intolerant. To uproot this
weed, you have to continually dig deep into the soil of your mind and heart
and repeatedly yank it out:
Think of ways to jump to positive conclusions or consider alternative
aspects of any problem, issue or situation.
Refrain from speaking or acting before hearing all the facts. Stop wasting
precious time and energy on what you think may have happened. There may be a
perfectly good explanation for why a particular action was taken. Ask for
it.
Avoid the tendency to pigeon-hole others or use labels and stereotypes.
Wishy-Washiness
Do you have a boss or co-workers who just can’t seem to make of their minds?
One minute they model commitment and confidence, promise to support and back
you up; the next minute they hesitate, become indecisive, and do not know
the right direction to take.
You will need both hands to handle this slippery weed:
Focus on what’s important. Ask for advice and insight. When you have
considered all the available facts, move forward with prudence and good
sense.
Put some stakes in the ground. Take a stand and stop straddling the fence.
Clearly outline any roles and expectations; then follow the plan.
Double-Talk
In the business world, double-talk looks like excuse making and blame
shifting. It often involves the deliberate use of ambiguous, vague or
confusing language that is spoken or written in an earnest, sincere or
meaningful tone. Yet, when you reflect on what you have just read or heard,
you realize it is a mixture of sense and nonsense, drivel, rubbish, and just
bunk! When someone uses double-talk, we are left with a bad taste in our
mouths. So, how do we get rid of this poisonous weed?
Don’t do it! Understand that to continue to engage in double-talk will
negatively impact your character, integrity and reputation in the end.
When you hear double-talk, try to discover motives, hidden agendas,
intentions and reasons by listening with an objective filter.
Hold yourself accountable for your mistakes and failures instead of making
excuses and blaming others.
Don’t let pervasive suckers and weeds choke your career and business garden.
Don’t just cut them out; yank them—root system and all! You’ll be more
successful if you do.
About the author:
Althea DeBrule, entrepreneur and seasoned human resources executive, has
focused for more than 30 years on helping people achieve their career goals.
Creator of The Extreme-Career-Makeover™ and a founding partner of RADSGroup
Organizational Consultants, she is recognized for her bottom line and
practical application of career development and management strategies in a
way that penetrates hearts and compels action.
She speaks and teaches with
inspired talent, humor and contagious zeal at management conferences and
leadership retreats nationwide, and has been featured in CFO Magazine,
Strategy@Work, Human Resource Executive Magazine. Althea is the author of
Bosses & Orchards, a compelling and candid book about how to make your work
relationship with your boss succeed. To discover how you can take your
career to a new level, visit
http://www.extreme-career-makeover.com/
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